Iloilo City: Home is where the heart is | Death: Number your days to D-Day

After a long while of being away from Iloilo City, having made the decision to leave, back in 2007, just exactly when I made the note to self that I actually like it here now, I'm home again.

After a week and counting of being here, what have I learned?

My parents are nicer. Yay! \o/

The skyway isn't so bad as I had thought it would be. It actually looks nice. Too bad I won't be using it anyway (this girl is resisting learning how to ride a car). :p

I like my city!!! I like my city!!! I loik my city!!!

I think I got a better deal in pants here than I had ever seen in Manila. Hahahahahahaa! Oh joy. Roll.

I'm missing my friends in Manila, though I am learning to take my own advice to a woman I love dearly: Live in the moment. Love the people immediately around you.

There is no use pining for my friends in Manila when I have quite a number of friends here who are waiting for me to infect them with my bubbleheaded laughter, my irreverent view of my foibles in my walk with Jesus and my unique understanding of who He is. Most of us think that He is a guy with a ruler waiting to measure us or spank us or what. I NOW think that He is a loving Father who is only courting our hearts because without Him, we are DEAD.

YES. God is a FUN God, despite the way He needs to get when He disciplines us.

And oh, be happy when God calls your name when you are running away. It is an undoubtedly concrete evidence of how He still loves you when you are being disciplined.

Do I pine for my Ate's in Victory Pioneer?

I guess there is a way of things working out for the good of those who love God... The last 3 months I had in Manila were spent mainly with those immediately close to me in my small group. Thus, my ties to the people around me were already being eased out... So I had not seen Ate Sam's dimpled face, Ate Catz's radiant glow, Ate Jem's motherly countenance, nor Ate Grace's (Gracia P.) quiet strength, and more so Ate Rayche's quiet wisdom, in these past few months. No time, no room to pine for and miss people. No need to, and more so no right to.

I used to be a creature of comfort. I liked the soft fuzzy warm things in life. I liked the idea of "safe." And in my current reading of One Month to Live by Kerry and Chris Shook, I re-realized that I have one big fear currently: living a life too safe, that I'd miss out on obeying God.

I realized then, in my reading, that life was meant to be lived on the edge. I realized that life was meant to be lived taking risks and living, loving, learning to the hilt of who you are and what you can give.

So yes, as my new SG Leader Ann and I had agreed, we shall be soaking first in understanding what One Month to Live has to offer. We want to reach other young women effectively. I personally have a vision that our group, not to be clique-ish or anything, shall be the most bubbly, the most fun, the most joyous, the most grace-ious, the most LOVING, around. Not because I want our group to be known for fame's sake. Because I just want to be part of the biggest ripple around here to infect others. I want to be the most infectiously light-shining, life-giving, joy-diffusing (thank you, Tristan!) of the creatures around.

Enough of CHURCH being equated to RELIGION. I's tired of THAT! Let's make CHURCH, VICTORY ILOILO, the best place to be in, every Sunday! Let's make Christianity the most enviable thing on earth to be a part of!

Enough of the concern on who is the greatest in the kingdom. Ministry?! What's THAT?! Seriously. If there's any one thing I take away from the greatest writer/prophet to impact my heart, Pastor Rick Joyner, it would be this: God's heart is touched only to the level of how faithful you were (in terms of being responsible of, allowing to grow) to what He has given you.

Another is the understandting that the greater the obstacle you had to jump through, and the more cavalier the attitude you took with which to survive it, the higher your reward, in the Lord's kingdom.

Those two snippets were my understanding of what Pastor Rick Joyner had written in his book The Vision (Final Quest part, I believe, the story of Angelo the beggar).

That is how I want to live my life: faithful to every little thing that is in my hands, one thing at a time.

So yes, I make a commitment to throwing all caution to the wind. I shall:

• Live fully: Passionately and without a care what other people may think and how they can harm me. To my possible enemies: I shall follow the strict quid pro quo rule: I won't hurt you with full deliberate evil machinations, and I expect God to keep me safe from your intentions as well. :p If you cross the line and burn even a single one of my split ends without due reason, Psalm 105:15 ("Do not touch my anointed ones; do my prophets no harm.") shall be your yardstick. :p
  
• Love with abandon: No matter how many times I get hurt by you, I shall love you, and you and you. :p
  
• Learn in full humility: Not to draw attention to myself, but I just want to share share share what God has done for me and what He could do for you, too.

I am going to be here for only 22,818 days more. So I have to make the most out of those 22,818 days, give or take a few days.

So I, Lorie Therese Locara, shall give it all I've got!!!

According to the Death Clock, I'm supposed to die on Monday, September 14, 2071. A full 87 years, 4 months, and a day!!! I subtracted my current age from that value (24 years, 9 months, and 28 days), in order to get my remaining days on this earth. The equation is 31,876 (days of my full life) - 9058 (days I had already spent). Phew.

I think the Death Clock states that I'll live well into my 80s because I'm the optimistic type. Heheh.

Enough of the mathematical nitty-gritties. Either way, these are the days I have left into my life, and I make a commitment to LIVE THESE DAYS FULLY.


Truth be told, I had said "goodbye" to my teens before I left Manila. I tried to get my two best Graviton buds to understand the significance of my leaving, but I was unsuccessful. I knew that I would be living my days faster. No longer would I stick to safe and comfortable in the coming days. My game plan for the 2-3 years that I will be here in Iloilo would be to:

• Love as many new people as I can.
• Meet as many new friends as I can.
• Help out whomever needs my help, in their ministry, just for the heck of it. (I'm looking at Ate Jenny Galopo, and my buddies in Victory.)
• Reach as many people who are jaded about the Jesus they were taught, as possible.
• Have as many people through Victory Weekend and see as many women flying in their relationship with God, as possible.
• Have as many cups of coffee on the perch God showed me I could use as the substitute for my Cityland rooftop sunrise-gazing post, here at home.
• Have as many cups of coffee I can brew.
• Squeeze the most out of my Me-and-God/Theo Afternoons, as I still could.
• Understand how I could make a go of all these in my 24-hour days, as possible, even as I juggle work and these targets. And sleep too. Heheh.

I don't know if I could regain the level of intensity that my high school friends and I had before, but I know that my days would get faster. My sked would be so squeezed and bled for the maximum, that I know that my metaphor for my life (Rocket), would become true...

These are exciting days. These are amazing days. This is no time to remain sleeping. This is no time to live on the SOMEDAY. The day to live is NOW!!!

Awaaaaaaake!!! You only have ONE LIFE TO LIVE!!!


And oh, somewhere in between all that, I might as well clean my room. Like right now. Heheh. :p